ZOMG YOU CAN HAS LIVE

[Carwin]

I can teach a lot of life lessons about stuff and junk. If you've got the following:
1. Two black shirts
2. Two black pair of trousers
3. One pair of heavy black shoes
4. Two pair of black socks and two pair of plain underwear.
5. One heavy black coat
6. One white towel
7. One army surplus cot mattress
8. One white plastic mixing bowl
9. Five hundred dollars personal burial money

and some spare time, then call me. IcanhazDurdenburger?